You Gotta Be Kidding

Young girl at doctors for check up " by the way, my boyfriend has terrible dandruff is there anything you could recommend"?
The doctor replies "Why don't you give him some head and shoulders"?
After a short pause "How do you give shoulders"?

A woman takes her miniature schnauzer to the vets with an ear infection.
The vet diagnoses the problem as an ingrowing hair inside the ear and advises the lady to use a depilatory cream to remove the hair.
The woman goes to the drug store and after a few minutes studying the various products she asks the salesman for some advice. He goes on at length about how some are good for facial hair and some are best used on legs "May I ask where you intend to use this?"
She replied "It's for my schnauzer."
He said "Use this one, but you should avoid riding a bike for a few weeks."

A lawyer and a doctor meet while fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer Said " I am here because the house I own burned down and everything I Had was destroyed. The insurance company paid for everything."
The doctor says "That's quite a coincidence. I am here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood. My insurance company also paid for everything."
The lawyer looked somewhat confused and asked "How do you start a flood?"